To Shriman Argeeji, Member RWA Managing Committee
Respeccted Bhau Saheb,
Congratulations for being in the news once again even before we could answer your letter to the Resident’s Welfare Association about the grave injustice done to you,an eminent member of a prominent caste to which some kings belonged, by Apartment security men, whom we have now removed (they were from North East, anyway (not amchi maanus).
We read in the newspapers that you have again had a brush with authority, now the Mumbai police. The reporter did not say how many times you beat the policemen with slippers. It may be because (1) he/she was weak at counting, (2) thought it was too obvious
to be mentioned, or (3) did not ask you.
He/she may have presumed that you, an eminent member of a prominent caste to which some kings belonged, do so by habit and would declare it any way, being proud of it.
Beating up policemen, thrashing a boy who did not get up and offer you his seat, ransacking a shop that sold goods made by people who do not speak our language, beating up drivers of taxis and autorickshaws belonging to communities other than our own, is our birthright as declared by our founder, an admirer of Nazis and Hitler.
We are proud of the acts of the members of your KCP (Khandani Collection Party) as the RWA management depends on your sharing the Khandani with us (for idiots who don’t know our language, though they have no right to live. Khandani means extortion money collected for providing protection to shops etc.)
How dare the policemen question you, an eminent member of a prominent caste to which some kings belonged, and not prostrate before you? It is good you abused and (perhaps) beat them with slippers. That will restrain them from arresting goons and criminals, in future, who are members of KCP.
The state and central governments whom you support, will not act against you, an eminent member of a prominent caste to which some kings belonged, as staying in power is more important to them than any principles or ideology.
Sir, this letter is to tell you that, as a token of our appreciation, we would like to present to you, an eminent member of a prominent caste to which some kings belonged, a pair of slippers at the function to rename KCP (many spell ‘Collection’ now in the wrong English way) as KKK (Khandani Kollection Klan), to be more in line with our founder’s thinking.
Hope you will accept them without using them on us.